channonyarrow | (no subject)

Dear world:

I am sick and tired of being treated as if I am the most terrifying bitch in the world. I am sick and tired, in fact, of being treated as any sort of bitch. Because you know what?

I'm not. It's all you, baby.

Every. Fucking. Time. Someone treats me like a bitch, it makes me more of one, more angry, more depressed, more defensive, and you still have no clue. I am not the scariest, meanest, most vicious mofo to walk the earth, and I am no longer interested in being treated that way.

But fuck. I'm so sorry that people can't seem to figure that out. I'll try harder to be sweetness and light and to disregard the fact that everyone has made up their minds who I am.

The only problem with that is that I only believe in apologising for things I'm willing to change. And I am not willing to pretend that the fact that I am a bitch is anything more than your perception problem. I am not willing to pretend that you do anything other than simply call me that to avoid addressing me. I am not willing to change my life for you.

Because it would be a pretty fucking drastic change right now.

I am not your bitch, I am not a bitch. If you are too fucking stupid and blind to see that, then I don't need you.

It fucking well hurts every time someone assumes that I am, goddamnit.

But I forgot. I'm a bitch. I don't have any feelings.

I never want to speak to another human being as long as I live. Since I apparently am so broken that I cannot even pretend to be human well.

No love whatsoever,
Cass

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I've not got to have nearly as much contact with you as I'd have liked, but...I've not thought you were or are a bitch.

((hugs))

~ Paige

Thanks tremendously. I was just getting it from a couple places at the same time and stressed.

How's your stuff sorting out?

*hugsback*

Badly.

Oh dear. If there's anything I can do, I will.

Thank you, but not much anyone can do. But I appreciate the sentiment. Truly.

*HUGS*

If someone can't be bothered to really know you enough to realize you're NOT a bitch, then it doesn't matter what they think. It still hurts, yes, but it's not worth changing your life for them, like you said.

Do you want to talk? About it or anything else? Should be on IM till late tonight.

Hope leach boy will peck you up a bit.

Leash boy picks me up a great deal.

Thanks for the offer - as I am now nearly a week later speaking to you. *smacks self*

And at least I think that no one's going to go after me like that again. Thanks tremendously.

*sends quiet waves of puppy support, which involves lots of licking your face*

*flops at your feet in a pile and wags tail*