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I am so freakin' tired of people who think that they can't sew, but they can TOTALLY make a wedding dress that will do A, B, and C, AND WILL LOOK GOOD.
If you can't sew a straight line (and a LOT of them) you have NO FUCKING BUSINESS sewing rows and rows and rows of ruffles to a skirt. NONE. NONE AT ALL, NOW PUT DOWN THE 'I AM BRIDEZILLA' CARD.
If you have NEVER SEWN more than a gored skirt, you ARE NOT READY TO TAKE ON CORSETING.
If you get tired of sewing, quickly, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO LIKE WORKING WITH AS MUCH TULLE AS YOU THINK YOU NEED.
If you are pregnant and making a tight-fitting dress NOW for a wedding in THREE MONTHS, YOU ARE INSANE AND YOU ARE DOING THE WRONG THING AND IT WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER WORK BECAUSE YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT SIZE YOU WILL BE.
If you think that you must cut a skirt round rather than straight at the waist, just BACK THE FUCK AWAY FROM THE SEWING MACHINE.
No one gets to have "the wedding of their dreams" when they have crappy dreams. Seriously. If you are 5'4", believe me, you do not want to wear an elliptical cage crinoline skirt, covered in rows of preruffled lace because you have no LEGS, and the dress will look FUNNY rather than beautiful. It's your wedding - go try on lots and lots and LOTS of dresses, even if you will never buy one, and find out what looks best on you, THEN COPY THAT STYLE. Do not simply say "I've always loved X, so I'll look great in it!" and go with what you want. This is the day that you will NOT be happy if you find out (for the thirty fifth time) that a dress like whatever you just picked makes you look like an extra from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, one listed in the credits as "Stumpy".
If you really cannot stand what looks best on you (ie, a bell skirt looks really good and you swore that you would never wear one) THEN you are free to start leaving the land of the sane behind and deciding that, at 5'0", you want to wear a dress that only works if you are extremely tall and thin (seriously, unrelated to weddings, the next short, fat person (and I speak as a tall fat person) I see wearing a 1930s dress is going to get STABBED, because it is ALL WRONG for your BODY, SO STOP IT, you cannot wear that dress if you are larger than an A-cup!) but when you are fifty you will not be happy with the pictures.
Go conservative for your wedding. TRUST ME.
Also, if you can't afford pre-ruffled lace (at about $.50 a yard) for your dress and you are spamming LJ to get people to send it to you in, like, four different colours, you have no business at all getting married, let alone reproducing. JUST STOP IT.
Argh. People wonder why I hate other people.
In other news:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
jkivela gets a *snug* because he is happy-making. Now I must think of something to give HIM.
If you can't sew a straight line (and a LOT of them) you have NO FUCKING BUSINESS sewing rows and rows and rows of ruffles to a skirt. NONE. NONE AT ALL, NOW PUT DOWN THE 'I AM BRIDEZILLA' CARD.
If you have NEVER SEWN more than a gored skirt, you ARE NOT READY TO TAKE ON CORSETING.
If you get tired of sewing, quickly, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO LIKE WORKING WITH AS MUCH TULLE AS YOU THINK YOU NEED.
If you are pregnant and making a tight-fitting dress NOW for a wedding in THREE MONTHS, YOU ARE INSANE AND YOU ARE DOING THE WRONG THING AND IT WILL NEVER, EVER, EVER WORK BECAUSE YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT SIZE YOU WILL BE.
If you think that you must cut a skirt round rather than straight at the waist, just BACK THE FUCK AWAY FROM THE SEWING MACHINE.
No one gets to have "the wedding of their dreams" when they have crappy dreams. Seriously. If you are 5'4", believe me, you do not want to wear an elliptical cage crinoline skirt, covered in rows of preruffled lace because you have no LEGS, and the dress will look FUNNY rather than beautiful. It's your wedding - go try on lots and lots and LOTS of dresses, even if you will never buy one, and find out what looks best on you, THEN COPY THAT STYLE. Do not simply say "I've always loved X, so I'll look great in it!" and go with what you want. This is the day that you will NOT be happy if you find out (for the thirty fifth time) that a dress like whatever you just picked makes you look like an extra from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, one listed in the credits as "Stumpy".
If you really cannot stand what looks best on you (ie, a bell skirt looks really good and you swore that you would never wear one) THEN you are free to start leaving the land of the sane behind and deciding that, at 5'0", you want to wear a dress that only works if you are extremely tall and thin (seriously, unrelated to weddings, the next short, fat person (and I speak as a tall fat person) I see wearing a 1930s dress is going to get STABBED, because it is ALL WRONG for your BODY, SO STOP IT, you cannot wear that dress if you are larger than an A-cup!) but when you are fifty you will not be happy with the pictures.
Go conservative for your wedding. TRUST ME.
Also, if you can't afford pre-ruffled lace (at about $.50 a yard) for your dress and you are spamming LJ to get people to send it to you in, like, four different colours, you have no business at all getting married, let alone reproducing. JUST STOP IT.
Argh. People wonder why I hate other people.
In other news:
jkivela gets a *snug* because he is happy-making. Now I must think of something to give HIM.