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I think there should be some statistical work done on my life with cars.
The basics:
- Age: 29.
- Number of years of driving: 7
- Number of years of hiatus in driving due to being out of the country: 2.5
- Actual number of years driving: 4.5
- Number of cars owned: 4
- Number of cars sold: 1
- Number of cars donated to charity due to, basically, not working: 1
- Number of cars totaled: 1
Miles:
- Rough guess of number of miles driven: 95,000
- Highest number of miles driven in one week: 1000
- Furthest north I have driven: North Vancouver, CA
- South: Oakland, in a borrowed car. In my own, Portland/Beaverton
- East: Spokane
- West: West side of Olympic Peninsula up 101
Accidents, tickets, and insurance:
- Number of times I have been officially labeled a menace to public safety: 1
- Amount of deduction in insurance after totaling one car: $11.00
- Number of accidents I have been in: I have no friggin' idea. 12? 15?
- Record for number of accidents I have been in: 3. In 2 days.
- Number of accidents that have gone to insurance claim: 3...I think. And I filed 2 of them. With the other party's agent.
- Number of cops hit: 1
- Amount paid by City of Seattle after hitting cop: $1000.00
- Cost of attorney: $500.00
- Need for attorney in event of actual hearing: Zip. Cop shot self in foot within two sentences.
- Number of tickets: Christ knows. 8, including the one taken off, I think.
- Odds that I will claim on you if you tell me that you couldn't see my Saturn because your Expedition was too big: High.
- Insurance rates for six months: Ridiculously low.
Other faults:
- Number of new windshields: 1. But another's coming.
- Months spent driving a car with a cracked head gasket: 10 after I took possession of it.
- Number of times a tire has spontaneously decided that the radial will seek freedom but the rubber will stay right there: 2, wtf.
- Alternators replaced in first car: Oh my god, probably 5?
- Number of alternators purchased to replace in first car: Twice as many as actual replacements.
- Joy of having a lifetime warranty on a rebuilt alternator: Very high.
So here I am at work, waiting for my parents to come and take me to Costco so I can replace another tire. This is the point of all this introspection: I have now had two cars where the belt has suddenly decided to part company with the rest of the tire.
My mother, who is 67 and has been driving since she was 18 at least, has had that happen to her once. My mother puts more miles on a car than I do.
WTF?
The basics:
- Age: 29.
- Number of years of driving: 7
- Number of years of hiatus in driving due to being out of the country: 2.5
- Actual number of years driving: 4.5
- Number of cars owned: 4
- Number of cars sold: 1
- Number of cars donated to charity due to, basically, not working: 1
- Number of cars totaled: 1
Miles:
- Rough guess of number of miles driven: 95,000
- Highest number of miles driven in one week: 1000
- Furthest north I have driven: North Vancouver, CA
- South: Oakland, in a borrowed car. In my own, Portland/Beaverton
- East: Spokane
- West: West side of Olympic Peninsula up 101
Accidents, tickets, and insurance:
- Number of times I have been officially labeled a menace to public safety: 1
- Amount of deduction in insurance after totaling one car: $11.00
- Number of accidents I have been in: I have no friggin' idea. 12? 15?
- Record for number of accidents I have been in: 3. In 2 days.
- Number of accidents that have gone to insurance claim: 3...I think. And I filed 2 of them. With the other party's agent.
- Number of cops hit: 1
- Amount paid by City of Seattle after hitting cop: $1000.00
- Cost of attorney: $500.00
- Need for attorney in event of actual hearing: Zip. Cop shot self in foot within two sentences.
- Number of tickets: Christ knows. 8, including the one taken off, I think.
- Odds that I will claim on you if you tell me that you couldn't see my Saturn because your Expedition was too big: High.
- Insurance rates for six months: Ridiculously low.
Other faults:
- Number of new windshields: 1. But another's coming.
- Months spent driving a car with a cracked head gasket: 10 after I took possession of it.
- Number of times a tire has spontaneously decided that the radial will seek freedom but the rubber will stay right there: 2, wtf.
- Alternators replaced in first car: Oh my god, probably 5?
- Number of alternators purchased to replace in first car: Twice as many as actual replacements.
- Joy of having a lifetime warranty on a rebuilt alternator: Very high.
So here I am at work, waiting for my parents to come and take me to Costco so I can replace another tire. This is the point of all this introspection: I have now had two cars where the belt has suddenly decided to part company with the rest of the tire.
My mother, who is 67 and has been driving since she was 18 at least, has had that happen to her once. My mother puts more miles on a car than I do.
WTF?
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All I can say is, if my teacher is actually the Devil's Handmaiden, God had better not plan on getting too much out of me. He's a fucker anyway. Getting women pregnant, smiting everything.
What a bastard.
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