channonyarrow

This is a chinchilla. It is small, grey, and friendly. graeae is giving me one, which was the brilliant plan I mentioned the other day. I hadn't planned to really mention it further until it turned out that three people had three different ideas on what it should be named. In desperation, I turn to you.

I told apiphile that I wanted to name it Wentz. She scorned this notion because, basically, the Wentz has a suite at the CDC, and it ain't for swine flu. She did point out that cute, fluffy, liable to chew on anything and unable to clean up their own shit made her think of Bert McCracken.

AND SO THE JOKE BEGAN.

Imagine the tweets about McCracken. About putting McCracken back in his cage. About McCracken shitting in his food tray again. About sleeping with McCracken. About, basically, everything that would make everyone on Twitter think that my apartment is Rock Star Prison Camp. (By the way, that should be a reality show. In my apartment.)

Enter graeae, worried because, and I quote, "Normally when you say great ideas, I try to think of something considerably less cute and more psychotic." She voted for Gerard, on the theory that chinchillas sort of basically look like Gerard.

And now I don't know what to call it. I like both McCracken AND Gerard as names, and both work for this joke. (What I really need here is two chinchillas.) So I ask you all.

[Poll #1396137]

I may not take your votes under advisement! I may, in fact, do whatever the hell I want! But everyone loves a radio button, so.

Okay, I know the tack I SHOULD take, but I also know that I don't WANT to take it. Please kick me in the ass.

I have a pro blog. It is not friended to anyone yet (except one person who will just have to deal.) I made last.fm, twitter, delicious, musicbrainz, shelfari, and tumblr accounts based on the name of that journal, but only the last.fm has exactly the same name. There is also a plus lj based on the name, for hosting background photos. Additionally, this journal is linked to my real name.

The name of the journal is based on a very obscure song lyric; it's not impossible to figure out, but it's also not part of the main vocal track so it's harder to hear than not.

AFTER I set everything up, I googled the name. There are several other users of the same name in different fora; the google hits list me three times (last.fm, lj, lj profile page) and then list an article entitled something like "Fuck the FCC in its ass" about the FCC fining a college radio station for playing a Scorsese interview that included fuck. There's also a MySpace, and a few other things. Obviously, none of these are mine, but there is no way to prove this that I expect anyone to spend more than two seconds on.

Therefore: a poll!

[Poll #1288195]

It would be wrong and bad for me to try to write something specifically to earn the most ghastly rating I can think of, wouldn't it.

So. Just to make sure that I got some creative new things in this fanfic of mine, I've created a poll.

[Poll #587728]

I am unable to decide which of the warnings below I like better.

Official Warning: The stories contained herein may contain...well, lots of warningy things. These stories may contain such things as erotic murder, premeditated murder, graphic violence, described sexual assault, rape, underage sex, prostitution/soliciting of same, torture, language fit to make your mother bleed from the eyes, gratuitous gore, religious denigration, racism, drug use, complete amorality, traditional dark legends (vampires, werewolves, and the like), and acts described by a number of penal codes and basic observance of the social contract as laid out by John Stuart Mill as illegal and immoral. I will even go beyond that and say that is what I currently know is there. That does not mean it's ALL that will ever be there. My mind is a horrific place of twisted fantasy, kind of like halloween candy with razor blades in, and I will add anything else I can think of to toss in there. If you are opposed to violence, or sensitive to discussion of same, do not read this. (swords_at_dawn userinfo)

Or!

RATING: This post rated NC-17 for: Erotic murder, premeditated murder, graphic violence, described sexual assault, rape, underage sex, prostitution/soliciting of same, torture, language, moderate gore, religious denigration, mild racism (against Muggles) and anything else I can think of to toss in there. There is a particularly gruesome rape/murder in here that is discussed explicitly. If you are opposed to violence, or sensitive to discussion of same, do not read this. A detailed rating from me is a sign you should all know by now. I do not want to hear about it if you decide you don't like what you read. As with all such posts, you do not have to read it. (A post for quiet_thinker)

Um, you can see that one came from the other. But basically, I love warnings. I love warnings even more than I love stories. I'm warm for warnings.

It's not an illness, it's a valid lifestyle choice. Stop judging me; I have medicine. I have bits of paper saying I'm sane. Not everyone has those.